Trowa's Proposal
by Adaon
Summary: Why am I doing this againBecause I need helpThat's apparent, but not a very good reason.... Because I'll resort to briberyThat's a good reason.


Trowa's Proposal

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam wing any more then, well actually I can't think of anything funny to say, so I'll just stick with "I do not own Gundam Wing"

I Also do not own the song Istanbul by They Might Be Giants, that has no bearing on this fic, but it's a funny song.

Lastly, this is a semi-sequel to one I wrote called "One Year." It's not really relevant except to one part, and all you need to know there is that Heero proposed to Relena every day for a year.

---

"I need your help."

"With?"

"Proposing."

"Budgets?"

"Marriage."

"Ask Maxwell."

"Tried that, it got me locked outside in thirty degree weather with no shirt."

"More information then I needed. Ask Quatre."

"He got stabbed in a 'fencing accident' after his proposal, I'll pass thanks."

"..."

"Not even going to suggest Wufei?"

"Sally got him drunk in Vegas, Since Une doesn't drink, that doesn't help you."

"True, but I wish I had a tape of that happening to Wufei, it would make great blackmail material."

"I got rejected probably by a pathetic record amount. What makes you think I can help?"

"She still said yes in the end, I figure if anyone know what not to do it's you."

glare

"Seriously though, I need help and I am desperate."

"You are not helping your case Barton."

"...I meant I'm willing to do anything you tell me."

"I wrote a best-selling series of novels that she loved and wrote a dedication that asked her to marry me."

"Ok ... I can see several reasons why that wouldn't work, but surely you know something that could help me?"

" (sigh) Only with basics and logistics."

"What does that mean?"

"Come up with whatever sap-full-fluffy-speech you are going to say and I don't want to hear anything about it."

"... Fluffy speech?"

"You do have a fluffy speech don't you?"

"... Um... no..."

"That's it, I'm out."

"What?"

"Do it yourself, and enjoy being a bachelor."

"So... I'm guessing the fluff is important...?"

"What did you actually do to propose the first time?"

"Standard stuff, candlelight dinner, dozen roses...."

"Stop."

"Somethings wrong... with roses?"

"Normally no, but it's Une we're talking about... roses ... Treize."

"Point taken, roses are out."

"Be sure to find a suitable replacement."

"Done. So we have dinner, flowers, ... music?"

"Get Quatre to play the violin."

"Right, so then desert and then the ring?"

"Followed immediately by rejection."

"What now?"

"Why am I doing this again?"

"Because I need help?"

"That's apparent, but not a very good reason."

"... Because I'll resort to bribery?"

"That's a good reason."

"15 year scotch. What's wrong?"

"30 year, you didn't set the atmosphere right."

"Deal, I thought that's what the candles and music were for?"

"Throw in dancing, starlight, and the right music, and you can get somewhere."

"right music?"

"Find out her favorite love song."

"..."

"You have a sister who is over-involved in your life in the first place, focus her efforts on something constructive."

"Do I mention the goal?"

"That depends on if you want her to take over planning the night."

"Ok, scratch that. So, dinner, starlight, dancing, carefully selected music, speech that Duo would never let me live down, and the ring?"

"Now you're getting somewhere."

"... I'm missing something aren't I?

"Yep."

"... It's bad isn't it?"

"Yep."

"... You're not going to tell me are you?"

"Nope."

"I'll throw in a second bottle of scotch."

"Mariemeia."

blink blink, "Baby sitter?"

"Bingo."

"You and Relena?"

"There isn't enough scotch in the world."

"Duo and Hilde?"

"They'll know something is up."

"Which leaves.... ?"

"Sally."

"That works. Anything else?"

"I'll be watching, and forever hold this night over you as blackmail."

"....wonderful...."

----

(Heero and Relena, watching from a distance)

"It's nice of you to record this for them, "

"... nice ... right ..."

"I'm not sure what that means, but I think I'll stick with my delusions that this is a good thing."

"I take it that dinner is Une's favorite?"

"As well as the desert."

"Quatre is doing a nice job with the violin... It would be nice to-"

"Second tape recorder on the left."

"Thank you."

sniff "That Speech was so sweet."

light evil chuckling

"... Why hasn't she said yes yet?"

"She's making him sweat it out some."

"Is it healthy to stay kneeled like that?"

"Probably not."

---

"Two bottles of 30 scotch. Now what do I have to do about getting that tape destroyed."

"Oh you're never getting rid of that."

"By the way... about the honeymoon-"

"Stop."

"But-"

"Absolutely no good can come of me hearing the rest of that sentence, just forget it."

"But-"

"None."

"... Mariemeia."

"Anywhere else, or Une finds out about the tape."

"I'm never going to get away from that tape am I?"

"Probably not."


End file.
